sha-sha

sha-doo.
i'm kind of sad because upon reflecting on my blogging, i realise i've become fairly self-conscious in my writing. i used to just be able to lay everything out, but now that i know people actually read this... lol. let's not be delusional here, who keeps a blog if they don't want anyone to read it?
but here is the point: i am tapping in to my september self, all dark and light from summer. bee, remember our random latenight meetings? i wore cutoffs and blue sneakers and guy's tshirts and i'd longboard over to your house in the orange and gray night. there was not even the trace of a chill. i never thought i'd be able to survive another winter here (though days like today make it worth it, despite the cold cold cold.)
i'm looking for that focus and that knowledge of priorities and of my SELF. i had no one to answer to. i wore my hair short.
i may possibly be in alot of shit with some people. but i've decided that i'm
a) taking responsibility for my actions
b) not letting other people berate me for them. i mean fuck, i know what i'm doing with myself, thanks. everyone makes poor choices. just some people are willing to admit that it wasn't entirely by accident.
actually, i just have so many things to sort out.... criiiinnnggge. i'd much rather be spending quality time with people. and i have plans to do exactly that! haha. i have a math exam. monday. after this i will never have to write another math test for my whole life... well, maybe lol.